What you can’t see is probably running the show

Seeing ourselves clearly isn't always easy — but has enormous impact

Every company I’ve worked with has its own personality. This personality mirrors the tone and attitude of its longstanding leaders*. The degree to which a culture is malleable, adaptable and resilient depends on how much its leaders are self-aware and willing to evolve. This is why I’ve come to believe that self-awareness in leadership is not a ‘nice to have’ — it’s an essential force that shapes the entire organization.

Research from Korn Ferry, which analyzed thousands of leaders, found a striking pattern: employees at low-performing companies were 79% more likely to have low overall self-awareness. Stock performance was tracked over thirty months, during which companies with a higher percentage of self-aware employees consistently outperformed the rest.

What this tells us is simple: self-awareness isn’t just personal work, it’s organizational work. When leaders cultivate it, clarity, trust and resilience ripple outward. When they don’t, cultures stagnate.

The tricky thing about self-awareness is that it’s subtle. Qualitative, not quantitative. Not easily measured, but deeply felt by everyone around you.

In my coaching work, we continually strengthen two types of awareness.

Internal awareness is how clearly you see yourself — your strengths, your weaknesses, your values, your growing edges, your impact on others.

External awareness is the degree to which you accurately understand how others perceive you. It’s about noticing when the story in your head matches the way others are experiencing you — and when it doesn’t.

One without the other creates an imbalance. A leader who knows themselves deeply but never seeks outside perspective risks walking around with blind spots. A leader who listens only to external perceptions risks losing their center. The work is in holding both.

The head of strategy and operations at a Fortune 500 company prided herself on being approachable. In her mind, she was always available to her team. But feedback from her boss, peers and direct reports told a different story — her team found her distant, even intimidating. She was surprised to hear this, and a little defensive at first. But that external input helped her see how much her stress levels were shaping her communication style. She began paying closer attention to her inner stance — thoughts, feelings, posture — as well as her outward actions. Rather than firing off an immediate response to an email, she found ways to disrupt herself and her default reaction patterns. It could be a stretch break, slowing down her reaction time, or pausing to ask herself if she was taking something personally. Each of these significantly improved the tone, delivery and impact of her messages.

That’s the gift of self-awareness. It doesn’t make us flawless leaders. It gives us choices we didn’t have before.

Speaking of choices, when was the last time you asked for honest feedback — from a colleague, a peer, or a client? And after hearing it, how did your actions and patterns evolve over time?

The culture your company carries is a natural reflection of you as a leader. The leaders willing to look clearly at that reflection — and do the work from the inside out — are the ones whose organizations authentically thrive.

*I added this asterisk to note that when a leadership team is new, the org’s self-awareness does not necessarily mirror that of leadership.

Cheers to the courage to see ourselves clearly and choose consciously.